shimmer_of_light (shimmer_of_gold) wrote in exanon,
shimmer_of_light
shimmer_of_gold
exanon

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Step 4.) A moral inventory of ourselves

Steps 1.), 2.), 3.), are in the post below...

inventory...that makes it all about me, my years in AA confuse me on this point because i'm not supposed to think about myself....

did i interfere with Samuel's recovery by dating him while he was still too new??!! He had a year and a half in our program, after a year off the wagon after ten years clean and sober. Shoot! then my committee says, that that makes me too big and powerful...you can't get someone drunk or sober....but my heart says you "can" pour someone a drink....

mental not to self..."do not date AA members, regardless of sobriety length, nor alcoholics"

God knows my character defects are many, I'm just better able to LABEL them, and well, notice when they are causing me pain faster....and not suffer from them as long as i used to....so,...possibly...

rushing into a relationship too fast....lust...loneliness...desire for intimacy/proctreative instinct...all funneling into fear of being alone...and finally just... fear...God grant me the wisdom to be more discerning about whether the enormity of a relationship may interfere with either of our spiritual growth....

Step 5.) see above....

listening for feedback before asking God to remove these instincts gone awry....
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